Past or Present

Help me I am confused
I love you and you love me
But you also love her
How can this be?

She is your best friend
I know this to be true
But how come when you’re with her
I am left in the blue?

We have fun when we’re together
I’m the first one on your list
But why is it when you’re around her
I don’t seem to be missed?

You say I am your life
I am everything to you
But why compare me to her?
Is she everything to you too?

Every time that we talk
You say how much you care
But why do you side with her?
Of my feelings you don’t seem aware.

We really need to be honest
I know I have really tried
But why not tell me when you visit her?
I feel to me you have lied.

I try my best to understand
Give you the benefit of the doubt
I smile to help ease the pain
Can’t you hear me crying out?

You think we are okay
You think we are just fine
I think you’re like the day
With the night for a mind.

What is your reasoning
To act the way you do?
What is your logic
To treat me like you do?

Don’t you see what’s happening?
Don’t you get what’s going on?
Can’t you feel our love crumbling?
Can’t you see I can’t go on?

I think we are not okay
I think we are not fine
You better tell me now
All that is in your mind.

I feel I am exhausted
You drive me mad day by day
But I can’t say, “Me or her?”
Should I just go away?

I want our relationship
To be one that’s strong and true
But why do you seem closer to her?
Are you and I one or two?

It’s hard to believe what you say
When often you keep me waiting
But when you hear a word from her
You go quickly without hesitating.

Are you oblivious to our problems
Because you are busy with school?
Are you purposely unmindful?
Because, I tell you, I’M NO FOOL.

–> yr. 2000, college, about a friend


2 thoughts on “Past or Present

  1. ohhh, trouble ahead on that one!! I actually have a good friend who just went through this, and the man did leave her and her children for the “friend.” Interesting. I am glad to see that date of 2000 at the bottom of this poem though. I could feel the pain and confusion in every word.


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